Lockdown Callisthenics: The Antidote to Pandemic Paralysis

Defeat lockdown lethargy with home callisthenics.

Callisthenics have been around, in some form or another, since ancient times. The word callisthenics comes from the ancient Greek words kállos (κάλλος), which means "beauty,” the aesthetic pleasure that derives from the perfection of the human body, and sthenos (σθένος), meaning "strength,” great mental strength, courage, and determination. The Spartans, at the Battle of Thermopylae, conducted their daily callisthenics, combed their hair, and polished their armor in preparation for their final stand against the Persians. Indeed, one of the advantages of callisthenics is their low cost and their accessibility, something to consider in these weird and strange times of lockdowns, social distancing, and of course, marauding gangs of zoomers in your local gymnasium.

Progression in callisthenics can be achieved in several ways, such as high-volume workouts, gymnastics-style callisthenics, or weighted callisthenics using external loads like weighted vests to increase intensity. The following is a beginner’s routine and a good introduction to the practice—as well as inspiration for more advanced workouts— and as such will focus on building a proficiency in the basic movements. Hopefully, this will benefit those of you who do not have regular access to a gymnasium or free weights, or perhaps for those traveling readers who are enjoying themselves in the far reaches of the globe, isolated from the luxuries of Western society.

[You Say Essential Worker, I Say Essential Lifter]

For the privileged among you, with your home gyms and squat racks, I invite you to try callisthenics for a time. Yes, it is known that bodyweight exercises are inferior to barbell exercises when it comes to lower body development; however, for upper body development, callisthenics can elicit the same muscular & skeletal responses as bodybuilding and barbell lifting programs. In my opinion, the best programs combine elements of barbells, free weights, and callisthenics.

Pythagoras in his apartment performing a squat.

For these callisthenics, the foundational movements are the pull-up, push-up, horizontal row, dip, hanging knee-raise, and the squat. Gaining proficiency in these will have great carryover to other movements and provide a great base level of fitness. I will also include the handstand as an optional exercise. Handstands are a fundamental skill in gymnastics and practicing them at this stage will work wonders for your body control and straight arm strength.

The following benchmarks, completed in one set for each exercise, with ample rest in-between, are good indicators of overall strength and fitness in callisthenics:

Pull-Ups: 12 reps
Dips: 18 reps
Horizontal Rows: 25 reps
Push-Ups: 30 reps
Squats: 50 reps
Hanging Knee Raises: 15 reps

Once these are achieved on your TEST DAY (see below), I recommend moving onto a harder program. The handstand work will be approached differently. For those of you starting from square one, I would suggest the following progression for handstand training:

Frog Stand: 30 seconds
Headstand: 30 seconds
Wall-Supported Handstand: 30 seconds

Once the wall-supported handstand is achieved, you can then practice freestanding handstands. Remember that the handstand is optional; if you include it in your workouts, make sure you carry out a thorough wrist warmup (like the one here) prior to the handstand practice. This will help protect and mobilize your wrists. Handstand training is a long-term pursuit, so do not be frustrated if the results do not come quickly.

[The Countere Guide to Deer Hunting]

Some of you may find movements like pull-ups and dips to be challenging, even at low reps. For this, I recommend purchasing resistance bands, which can be bought very cheaply. You can use these to help support your weight, which will decrease the resistance, allowing you to complete more reps. You can also use them in the opposite fashion to increase resistance (here is a handy video guide on how to do this). Gymnastics rings are another wise purchase and can be bought at a reasonable price. They can be attached to any sturdy beam or support and provide the means to do excellent strength training in lieu of other equipment. Be warned though, the rings’ natural instability makes them harder than pull-up and dip bars.

That being said, my knowledge and expertise is just information I have picked up over the years from various sources. I am not a personal trainer, and I am no way qualified enough to recommend any of these exercises. Proceed at your own risk, as always.

Equipment Needed

Pull-Up Bar: Can be monkey bars at the local park, a literal tree branch, or a doorway pull-up bar. Buy one like this.
Gymnastics Rings: Optional but have great utility. I have sometimes hung these from trees in parks, although park custodians can get confrontational.
Resistance Bands: Useful for scaling back the difficulty on some exercises, and good for warm-ups and accessory exercises.
Jump Rope: Optional, but very effective for training the calves on a budget.

Program

The first thing we need to do is test your fitness.

TEST DAY

Yes, all-caps. This is very important. Dedicate a day to test the movements listed above—pull-ups, dips, horizontal rows, push-ups, hanging knee raises, squats—and give plenty of time to rest between each exercise. We are looking for maximum reps here, but do not sacrifice good form to cheat your scores—get your chin over the bar, stahp that, higher!

For the pull-ups, dips, and hanging knee raises, subtract 3 from your test score (if you got less than 3, use resistance bands for assistance). For the rows and push-ups, subtract 5, and for the squats, subtract 10. Congratulations, you now have your rep ranges, which we’ll call TestReps, for the workouts. See, this is easy! On to the workouts.

Workout A1: Upper Body

Warm-Up: Arm circles, band dislocates, jumping jacks, band pull-apart, plank 15-30 seconds, side plank (each side) 15-30 seconds. 10 reps for each exercise, unless otherwise stated, completed as a circuit twice.

Optional: Wrist warm-up. 3 x 30 second handstand work.

Give yourself adequate rest (1-3 minutes) to recover between the following sets:

3 x TestReps Pull-Ups
3 x TestReps Dips
3 x TestReps Rows
3 x TestReps Push-Ups

For example, do your pull-up TestReps, rest for a bit, do your pull-up TestReps again, rest, pull-up TestReps, and then rest before moving onto the dips.

Finish off the day with some light stretching. Nothing fancy, the ones they taught you in PT will work.

Workout B1: Lower Body

Warm-Up: Jog on the spot for 30 seconds, jumping jacks, burpees, lunges, dorsal raises. 10 reps for each exercise, completed as a circuit twice.

Give yourself adequate rest (1-3 minutes) to recover between the following sets:

3 x TestReps Squats
3 x TestReps Hanging Knee Raises
3 x 8 Jump Squats
3 x 8-12 Glute Bridge
4 x 15-25 Calf Raises

Finish off the day with some light stretching.

Workout A2: Upper Body

The following exercises are to be conducted in a circuit fashion. This is called supersetting. Supersets involve pairing two or more exercises together. For example, after a set of pull-ups, rest 30 seconds, then complete a set of dips, rest again, then repeat the cycle until the sets are done.

Warm-Up: Use the same warm-up as Workout A1.

Pull Ups x (TestReps-3)
Rest 30 seconds
Dips x (TestReps-3)
Rest 30 seconds
Rows x (TestReps-5)
Rest 30 seconds
Pushups x (TestReps-5).

Rest 30 seconds, then cycle back to pull-ups.

Complete as many rounds as possible (AMRAP) until your form starts to break down and you fail reps. Enjoy the misery.

Finish off the day with some hanging from the bar. Let your shoulders relax, this is an awesome lat and pec stretch. Then do some light stretching.

Workout B2: Lower Body

Warm-Up: Same warm-up as Workout B2.

4 x TestReps Squats
Sprints or Hill Sprints: Interval sprints are an effective way to target the hamstrings and glutes. 8 x 80 meter sprints on the minute would be a good starting-off point. Sounds quite low-volume but if you are going for max effort, you will feel it. Increase the distance and reps as you see fit.
3-4 x Calf Raises for 20-25 secs. Alternatively, you can try jump rope, 45 secs on, 15 secs off, for 5-10 minutes (another favorite of the Greeks).

Finish off the day with some light stretching.

Accessory Day

A more relaxed day. Warm up with some mobility and band exercises. Sun salutations are always energizing.

Optional: Wrist warm-up. 3 x 30 second handstand work.

3 x TestReps Hanging Knee Raises

I’ll also permit some arm training if you fancy it.

3 x 12 Bicep Curls and Triceps Extensions. You can do these on gymnastics rings as well.
3 x 10-15 Lateral Raises with some light weights or resistance bands. Medial delts usually require some isolation work, even on heavy barbell programs.

Finish the day off with some light stretching.

Schedule

For beginners I recommend the following schedule:

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday	Sunday
A1	Rest	B1	Rest	Accessory Day	Rest	Rest

The next week will be as follows:

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday	Sunday
A2	Rest	B2	Rest	Accessory Day	Rest	Rest

Use this two-week cycle for 6 weeks.

For the more experienced lifters among you, feel free to try the following schedule:

Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday	Sunday
A1	B1	A2	B2	Accessory Day	Rest	Rest

Follow either schedule for six weeks. At the end of the six weeks, take a few days off to relax. Test yourself again on the movements to recalibrate and go from there. Once you have achieved the recommended reps that were stated earlier as the benchmarks, give yourself a pat on the back; you will have achieved a solid base level of fitness and are ready to go onto the more advanced callisthenics movements.

Nutrition

I will not devote too much time to nutrition, as there is an abundance of information out there by people much more educated than I am. The sets and reps here are fairly high, with moderately high intensity for the average gym-goer. With that in mind, if you are on a calorie deficit, be wary of fatigue and overloading yourself. Keep the protein high, from good sources, and think about eating more on the higher volume days. Alternatively, you could just slonk eggs until the cows (chickens?) come home.

[I Ate Raw Beef From Six Different Cultures]

Afterword

I have dabbled with many different forms of training over the years, but I always find value in the simplicity and accessibility of callisthenics. I love a good callisthenics program, and I also love sharing information and helping people to get involved in sport and fitness. I find the current trend of charging ridiculous sums of money for very basic programs to be stingy and cynical, and wanted to help some of the newbies get to grips with the basics without getting ripped off. Maybe I’m too soft, I dunno. If you want moar, or are interested in more advanced stuff, pls don’t hesitate to contact me on teh Countere Discord.